Stories from Those Who Knew My Father
One of the pleasures of publishing a memoir about my father is how many people write and call me with stories about him. Of course I know that he was much respected by the people he worked with. As I quote in the book, “I have never worked for a better managing editor or a nicer guy,” and “I guess it’s enough to say that, in my opinion, few have been privileged to work for a fairer person who tried to do an honest job.”
Still, it’s lovely when Ada Feyerick, who was a history-archeology editor at Horizon, tells me on the phone that my father was the best person she ever worked for, considerate and relaxed and supportive. (Ada has written a wonderfully engaging memoir herself, The Sixties: An American Family in Europe, available from Academia Books, 15 E. Hartshorn Drive, Short Hills, NJ 07078.)
Oliver Jensen and Joe Thorndike
Ada came to my father’s funeral service on the Cape in 2006, as did Bob Ginna. I didn’t know Bob (though I’d read plenty about him in James Salter’s memoir, Burning The Days), but he told some great stories about working with Joe Thorndike in New York.
Shirley Tomkievicz, yet another editor at Horizon, writes to me about my father and his friend Oliver: “Yes, Joe did reach out with more flair than Oliver, because for all his reserve, Joe was warmer than Oliver and not nearly so walled in. Much less conventional.”
My father was warmer than the outgoing and exuberant Oliver! Much less conventional! How I love hearing these other perspectives.
Don’t we all want this, for our parents to be remembered? It wasn’t my first goal in writing the book—I began it because of how crushing it was to watch my father’s mind disappear—but it gladdens me now to talk to these people who knew him.
And these days, to balance things out, I’m writing a novel about my mother. Only fiction can do her justice.
Tags: ada feyerick, alzheimer's, Bob Ginna, caregiving, Horizon Magazine, james salter, oliver jensen, Shirley Tomkievicz
I absolutely loved your book. When I finished it, I missed and thought about both of you for a long time. Your stories hold many great life lessons and I wish you the best.
Thank you, Sandy Kraimer. And imagine how much more I have thought about my father because I wrote this book! The book, and keeping this blog about it, ties me to my father every day. It’s a kind of prayer, a bond, a way to keep him close.